I'm supposed to have stopped smoking.
It's no secret though that I have long forgotten that self-made pact.
And today feels like a yosi day.
You know what I mean?
It's one of those days na kung pwede lang ay may nakatapal na sigarilyo sa nguso mo buong maghapon...
Habang nagawa ng email...
Habang nakain ng lunch sa harap ng PC...
Habang nasa meeting...
Habang may kausap sa telepono...
Kahit habang nagyo-yosi, parang gutso ko pang yumosi!
On my way home, I took a leak in one of THOSE restrooms in Shang. A cute-ish preppy-looking guy was beside me in the urinal and I noticed he was extra vigorously in... um... making "pagpag" his thang.
I checked and he was checking out my y'know...
He was cute
as in if I weren't so I tired I would've said, "Heck" and just went with it.
But I was not getting any "significant" reaction
I was THAT tired.
No, lemme rephrase that: I AM that tired.
I'm not a laborer but my shoulders ache like hell
So I zipped up, washed and headed out the mall.
Immediately outside the exit, I took out my pack, only 2 sticks left. I popped a candy in my mouth and lit a stick.
It feels good as the menthol-y smoke circles my lungs and clings on to my already-itchy throat.
I started walking
Then pressed "PLAY"
And I cannot remember
What life was like through photographs
Trying to recreate images life gives us from our past
And sometimes it's a sad song
But I cannot forget
Refuse to regret
So glad I met you
Take my breath away
Worth all of the pain that I have
And mama I've been cryin'
Cause things ain't how they used to be
She said the battles almost won
And we're only several miles from the sun
Last Sunday, a good friend texted me and said:
It's OK to remember.It's OK to be sad.It's OK to miss everything about him...But you have to accept what happened, to let go, and forgive the past.Most importantly forgive yourself
Yes, my dear, we're only seven miles from the sun.