Friday, September 25, 2009

Ang Saling Ket-Ket

I am too anxious to sleep.

This has been, probably, one of the longest days.

There was a lot of new stuff to digest... and now, it seems, they are not doing so well with my bowels - and I'm not talking of just food here.

There's a lot of changes coming our way.

I've been plucked out of the nest and placed on the precipice, quite unsure if this is going to be my first flight or is someone just going to push me over the edge and fall SPLAT on the cold hard mountainside...

A lot of things are going through my head and I have to admit, most of them are unpleasant.

Needless to say, I am not too fond on where I've been placed ~ most especially in relation to where my sisters have been placed respectively.

While it seems (at least from my POV) that the other hatchlings will be moving on to venture into new adventures, each quite challenging and exciting in themselves, I am placed in a position where I won't seem to be moving anywhere and at the same time, taking a backwards step as, it would seem, I have been placed below my fellow hatchlings.

Given, of course, that of all the eggs, I came out last, that does not, in any way, suggest that y value, as a chick, is less than that of my sisters.

I am wondering, will my sisters suddenly become eaglets while I will magically transform ninto the ugly step sister hatchling who will just 'service' their needs?

With our changed status, my sisters, while facing challenges of some magnitude in themselves, have definite paths to take. I, on the other hand, feels like (for the lack of better terms) a saling ket-ket ~ someone who is just part of the game, but does not really put in as much value as the real players.

If that would be the case, then I guess it would be better for me if I just leave the nest altogether.

* * *

I'm sorry if you do not understand what I am talking about. As it is, I still cannot reveal what the issue is all about. I might, though, in due time. But for now, I just needed an avenue to release my anxiety and finally get some sleep.

Tonight I'm sleeping with fingers crossed.

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