Saturday, June 20, 2009

Quirk of Folks: Mr. Kuyukot (butt crack) Man

I had the privileged DISpleasure of sitting behind this guy during this morning’s staff meeting.

There I was, a mug of mocha at hand, sipping innocently, when this guy sat on the monoblock in front of me and LO AND BEHOLD there’s his gritty-looking butt crack and flashy red checked boxers staring me right in the face! Ick! Gag! Puke!

I’d like to call him Mr. Kuyukot (butt crack) Man – for the obvious reason that he displays his, er, ASSet... not just this morning but all the time… deliberately…

Peeking undies, peeking butts

Well, normally, this would be reason for a raving blog… I mean, a guy, showing off his butt!?! C’mon!!! Unfortunately, Mr. Kuyukot Man is the living proof that there’s an exception to every rule.

Peeking undies seem to be a trend among guys these days. What with the popularity of low rise jeans, I mean, one can't go freeball all the time, right?

Whether deliberate or not, I say it’s kinda zexy! Of course, it kinda depends on the flasher and the undies being flashed. Nevertheless, it’s always kinda naughty-nice to get that “hello!” down there. Hahaha

This isn’t THAT kind of blog, but I hafta admit, when it’s my boyfriend’s undies that’s peeking, it kinda… huwell, y’know… makes me go “rawr!”

However, Mr. Kuyukot Man gives me a different urge – the strong and almost uncontrollable desire to yank his pants up and staple them onto his butt.

Just plain disgusting

Mr. Kuyukot Man took the trend a bit further and does more than let his boxers peek: he displays most of it (imagine 3-4 inches below the waist/hips) in broad daylight… inside the office… ugh!

Mr. Kuyukot Man appears to be a devout follower of the low-waist fad that was sooo popular way back in the 90s. It’s bad enough that he’s bringing the dead style back, he has to display his tacky boxers which seems to be products of poor laundry.

Usually sporting colorful (and seemingly loose-fitting) boxer shorts, he waddles around with his denims hanging on for dear life around his butt. To complete the “huwatdafack-were-you-thinking” look, he also got that oddly bemused and dazed look on his face matched with a partially open mouth (god forbid if he should drool!). In a tragic way it totally compliments his awful sense of style (well, it’s not TOTALLY awful, but the unflattering boxer display is just too much to bear).

Okay, I have double standards.

To be fair, it’s not as if, it’s a hard-on inducing butt crack he’s displaying… it’s a jiggling, flabby, and quite disgustingly dark (read: mukhang may libag!!!) bit of flesh he parades around the office.

The amazing thing is, Mr Kuyukot Man has got (what would seem like) a girlfriend…


Well, maybe that display has it’s effects on SOME people after all…

Oh well, I just wish he’d tuck it in when he’s at work. I mean c’mon!!! If it works for his lady, then maybe he should just keep the butt crack tease in the bedroom.

As for me, well, I just to be as far away from that camote plantation. PLEASE!

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