Thursday, June 11, 2009

It's OK to be gay!

The first thing I do when I get home is Facebook. We don't get to do it in the office, so all that Facebooking eagerness explodes on my laptop the moment I get home.



I usually Facebook till I fall asleep on the keyboard. Some people drink milk, some take warm showers, me, I Facebook to get sleepy

And then I saw this one friend's status message... PUTANGINA nawala ang antok ko.

Almost EVRYBODY knows he's gay... and now he's announcing to the world that he's looking for a relatonship.. wth a GIRL!!!

)(*%)W#%_#)&Q@&$($_@&%)(*^%(Q^#%(!!!!!!!

POTAH!

wait... lemme get a hold of myself...

....

....

....

....

...

POTAH TALAGA EH!!!



The closet case

Itago natin siya sa pangalang... Tweety (wala lang)



He's one of my closest friends. Despite that, however, he still hasn't come out to me nor to our other friend (let's call her Lucy). When I (finally) announced (more like acknowledged) my green blood-edness, we thought he would follow suit. We were, of course, very much disappointed.

Unlike me, Tweety's not a flaming flamboyant queen of faggotry. So I guess it's not THAT obvious. And since he hasn't told us anything, we just assumed he's straight.

That is, until RUMORS about him started to spread.

"Tweety, nilayuan ng barkada dahil nililigawan ang kabarkadang lalaki"

We said: "no way, he's straight"

"Tweety ayaw tigilan ang kabarkadang lalaki, nililigawan kahit sa YM at email"

We said: "KALOKA! he's straight kaya!"

"Tweety nabugbog dahil nanghipo ng lalaki"

We said: "grabe na yan a! mas OA pa sa the Buzz!"

Someone told me "Hindi ba kaibigan mo yang si Tweety? Bakit hindi mo alam na bading siya?"

HABAMALAYBALAYBUKIDNON!!!

We did what good friends do: defend him. He told us he's straight and we're standing by him.


BUSTED!!!


Lucy had an alcohol binging birthday party. Aside from Tweety and me, she also had other guests who were absolutely fantastic people.

The alcohol was overflowing, Lucy was mixes were like delicious poison, soon enough everyone's wasted... off to bed for the gang... EXCEPT for Tweety...

Tweety hung around the living room where one of the guests (a guy - let's call him Manolet) was sobering up

Tweety came up to Manolet... ran his hand across Manolet's chest and whipered... "wag kang magalala tayong dalawa lang naman ang makakaalam e"



#(%^*#&%)&^&^)Q#Q#(%^*#&%)&^&^)(&&$_#!!!

POTAH NAMAN TALAGA!


Game Over


From then on, it's been a different playing field...

He still hasn't outed himself... And I respect that... All in good time, whenever he's ready.

But PUH-LEASE in the name of all that is fabulous and pink! Tigilan na natin ang pagpapanggap na STRAIGHT ka!!!



Nasusuka na kami!!

sa tuwing nagkukuwento ka na may criush kang bilat

sa tuwing nagkukuwento ka na may "nalilink" na gurlalet sa iyo

sa tuwing nagkukuwento ka na may "nililigawan" kang bellatrix

Those STORIES do NOT prove anything other than the fact that you are PUTTING ON A SHOW; that you are TRYING SO HARD to convince people that you're straight...

The problem is that YOU ARE FAILING... miserably!

You can't convince people that you are something you are not... You can't even convince yourself...

So please save us from exhasperation and save yourself from misery and ridicule...

You are G-A-Y, gay!

You know what the funny thing is?

It's not actually a big deal... but you're turning it into one...


Mabalik tayo sa Facebook

And now you're announcing that you are single... looking for a relationship... interested in women...

Let's not kid ourselves, my friend. Kaya nga ayaw kang i-add ni "730" sa Facebook kasi tropa kayo tapos pinagnasaan mo siya ng bonggang bonga?

If you can't accept the fact that you are gay... y'know what? fine. You can stay in the closet for as long as you want. You can PRETEND to be straight for as long as you want.

But please... don't you even think of sucking someone else into your lonely hole of self-hate... If (and only if - coz I'm rather dubtful you'd be able to get a girlfriend) ever you do manage to get yourself a girlfriend... you'll only end up making her as miserable and as broken as you are...

Parting words, my friend, from the muth of Miz RuPaul herself:

If you can't love yourself, how the hell y'gonna love somebody else?

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