Saturday, January 17, 2009

What's with the label?

Originally posted here

DISCLAIMER: Pasintabi po sa mga nabanggit na pangalan sa baba. wala pong personalan, all in the name of humor :


I ran across a very interesting post from Lex Bonife from his blog titled "Labels", and I quote:

Why do many players in the gay hook up scene play around with labels – “straight curious”, “bi-curious”, “straight tripper” and all permutations of “call-me-anything-except-gay-man”? Isn’t this just a sign that we actually dislike our own selves?

Which got me thinking... bakit nga ba?

When I was in the hospital, I've been amusing myself with the kalurky pink book "Mga Kuwentong Parlor ni Wanda Ilusyunada" (which is a REALLY nice read if you can get past the "overt gayness")


Heniwei, He has a post which is pretty related to Lex's question (check it out here: where he attempts to define these so-called labels...

To a certain extent I feel that the use of these labels within the community has its purpose. The LGBT (Lesbians, Gays, Bisexuals, and Transgenders) community is diverse and to some point, I guess people would have to have some way of breaking down this diversity into smaller, chewable parts...

That is why there are term such as those that we use to classify people in the community:

(Terms used as per Wanda, I'm just putting in some bits of my own)
Parlorista The typical gay man we grew up to see portrayed by Roderick Paulate in old Pinoy movies... They are the Ricky Reyes of the world. Proud mommas, berdeng berde ang dugo at pulang pula ang hasang. Mostly effeminate and flamboyant, these days not all of them, though, are in Parlors, mind you...

Basically gays who are in the closet and are trying to hide their true self from the world (this type has a lot of bearing on Lex's post, but I'll discuss that later). There's a common misconception that straight-acting=closetta. (Ex: Papa Piolo and Sam Milby! hahahaha) Maraming closet case ang halata ng bading ayaw pa umamin

Put simply, THESE are the straight-acting gays. They may be out or closetted (depende) but whatever the case, they are not pre-disposed to be effeminate or flamboyant (maybe on certain occassions lang). (Ex:, International naman:

Reichen Lemkuhl (of Amazing Race fame ex BF to Lance Bass)

Mark Feehily (from Irish boyband Westlife BF of Kevin McDaid)

AAAAAAAAAAAAANNNND Sam Milby better Half of Papa Piolo (charoz!)

Silahis These guys have the best of both worlds... They can get it "up" for both men and women. Now, I personally haven't met a true-blue bisexual dude. Most often than not being bisexual is just a phase for closet cases prior to coming out and becoming full-fledged followers of faggotry (hehe) Though, ayon sa kalakhang pandaigdigang sapot, ang mga sumusunod na celebrities ay bisexual:

1940's actress of the silver screen Marlene Dietrich

The once bad-ass, brother kissing now better half of Brad Pitt (lucky bitch) Angelina Jolie

Cross dresser aka Transvestite aka Dragona
These are guys, who basically love wearing women's clothes (or vice versa) pasok dito ang mga bongang bongang dragonang naglipana sa Glorietta at Greenbelt 3... (peace)

Sila naman ang mga kawawang nilalang (and I don't mean this as a joke) who feels like they are trapped in the wrong body and has the urge to become the opposite sex. NOT all are in drag and not all may have surgery. Perfect example dito ang beautiful boxer (Parinya Charoenphol):

O di ba? bonga!

Pero mabalik tayo sa tanong ni Lex...

Ano ang mga Straight-tripper? ano ang bi-curious? at ano ang straight curious?

Ayon sa aking mga napagtanungan (hindi ko ire-reveal kung sinu-sino):

straight-tripper ay isang "straight" na lalaki na nakikipag-sex sa kapwa niya lalaki dahil "trip lang niya" therefore it's just s-e-x no strings attached...

bi-curious/straight-curious ay mga "bi"/"straight" na pumapatol sa kapwa nila lalaki dahil "curious" lang sila...

So, ayon sa mga taong ito, hindi sila gay or bi or any of the terms mentioned... and according to these guys... there's a difference...


At this point, I wanna go back to one of the earlier terms mentioned: CLOSETTA

Contrary to Lex's theory that this is a manifestation of self-hate, I believe this is a case of self-denial (as in hiding in the closet) and/or a manifestation of a complex "outing"...

These people just don't want to be called "gay" or "bi" for reasons I wouldn't even try to fathom. Personally, I feel that people don't want to be labeled as such because of the stereotypes attached to such labels...

And I think it is FEAR of being sterotyped that is driving these people to segregate themselves from people much like themselves and create a "sub group" or an illusion of a "sub group". and hence, even blurring and/or complicating their Self-identity

SUch as it is, let's not HATE people... cool lang...

BUT since we are trying to embrace diversity, instead of shunning such people, I feel that it is the comunity's ability to assimilate that will (eventually) help these individuals to come out of such obscurity of identity (at least on the individual level)...

Going out of the closet is very difficult (don't I know it?) and I feel that, annoying as it may be to some, such labels and/or ideas will continue to emerge. For as long as our culture is bigoted and judgmental, for as long as we subscrie to conservative ways of thinking, the journey towards self-discovery (and ultimately self-acceptance) will always be a challenge.


  1. Amen to that, Mare!

    Dahil d'yan friends na tayo, lagay kita sa blog roll ko at sana ako rin!



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